Wednesday was a normal day for us all. Zack spent some time with his friend Chris T., visiting with his family and just being typical kids. He was feeling tired, and worried that his counts might not be well enough for chemo on Thursday. He is anxious to get this all finished, I can't blame him. I am working on my anxiety levels with regards to him constantly being monitored. It is as if we are under an umbrella right now, protected from everything and the umbrella will be removed, leaving us vulnerable. I know that seems extreme, but anyone that has been through a crisis like this, for an extended period of time, has full understanding of these feelings. They are neither right or wrong, they just are. I also know, with each day, we will all get stronger and learn to adapt to our new normal, just as we have for the past nine months.
The evening was nice and quiet. Zack spent his night resting, playing video games and on Skype with an old girlfriend who now lives in Idaho. It's always nice to see him have a good time visiting. There was a lot of laughing and cutting up. I must say, he plays it safe. All of his "girlfriends" have been long distance (a mothers dream..smile). When I arrived home, Frank was half asleep on the couch, tired from a full days work. I had worked late catching up on paperwork (something I love to do every now and then) and had gone to bed as soon as I arrived home. Diverticulitis returned again, so I haven't been feeling my best. Hopefully in the next couple of weeks I can schedule a colonoscopy and see why this keeps returning. I keep having people ask me why I haven't done this yet, but Zack and his schedule must be a priority it's not that easy, when you are a care giver (I don't care how many lectures I get) to stop to care for yourself. I do the best I can, but since this does keep returning and quickly, I need to get it checked out and at least rule out some things.
The evening was nice and quiet. Zack spent his night resting, playing video games and on Skype with an old girlfriend who now lives in Idaho. It's always nice to see him have a good time visiting. There was a lot of laughing and cutting up. I must say, he plays it safe. All of his "girlfriends" have been long distance (a mothers dream..smile). When I arrived home, Frank was half asleep on the couch, tired from a full days work. I had worked late catching up on paperwork (something I love to do every now and then) and had gone to bed as soon as I arrived home. Diverticulitis returned again, so I haven't been feeling my best. Hopefully in the next couple of weeks I can schedule a colonoscopy and see why this keeps returning. I keep having people ask me why I haven't done this yet, but Zack and his schedule must be a priority it's not that easy, when you are a care giver (I don't care how many lectures I get) to stop to care for yourself. I do the best I can, but since this does keep returning and quickly, I need to get it checked out and at least rule out some things.
It is now Thursday and as I leave for work, Frank and Zack are getting ready to go to the Cancer Center. They have an early appointment so we will find out quickly if Zack gets his chemo today. By 10 am they advise him that his counts are well enough and start him on IV fluids. I can't help but think about the difference in communication between men and women. When I'm with Zack, I'm texting or calling Frank to let him know what is going on, heck I let the whole world know! I found myself calling him or Zack several times for updates. Frank tells me he saw Zack texting, so he assumed he was letting me know what was going on. I had to laugh. It's definitely a gender issue.
I continued to work, taking a nice long lunch break. I went to Moms booth ,dusted and rearranged her beautiful pieces of jewelry. It's always a nice change of pace for me when I can do that. It's part of my creative process that I love to do, decorating and cleaning. She is working on several pieces for the silent auction at the Fund raiser, we are so excited about everything to do with this event. What a great way to wrap up a long journey!
Zack and Frank wrapped up around 5 pm and grabbed dinner on the way home. Zack had slept most of the day during treatment so he was pretty well rested when they arrived home. He was very nauseous, but in a pretty good mood considering. On my way home I call Mom to see how her day went. She mentions about the post Zack put on FB about how many treatments are left. I am in shock, this is the first time I hear the numbers, not the time frame. ! I arrive home and ask Zack and Frank. They both stated that when Zack asked the nurse, she confirmed he has three more out patient and one more hospital treatments. Once those are completed he will have the full course of testing to ensure that everything is still gone. In a couple of months following they will remove the port access. So, we are looking at the beginning of May when he will be done with chemo. YAHOO!!
It is now Friday morning and for some reason I can't sleep. It is 6:30 am and I'm wide awake. I turn on the TV hoping it would put me back to sleep and after a couple of hours Zack comes in. (Frank had woken him up on his way out to work). Zack flops down on the bed like a little child, not the 6' 5" giant he has become. We have some time before his 3 pm appointment today, so we just take our time and rest. Before I know it he is sound asleep and snoring while lying next to Sidi at the foot of the bed. Like any of us, every now and then we simply want to be with our mother (if we are blessed enough, as I am, to have them still with us).
Zack is not in the best of moods when we leave the house, but by the time we arrive at the Center, we are joking and he is teasing me about everything. I love the way he can turn everything around. We arrive and with a single shot of Neulasta in the arm, he is done. Zack tells them he is not feeling well and the Doctor tells us we should have come in earlier so he could get IV fluids. I then look at the Doctor and tell him that we stopped and Zack ate Taco Bell on the way there, so he feels bad but not due to lack of hydration. The nurse and Doctor both laugh and say "that makes US nauseous, if you can eat like that you're feeling ok." Zack looks at him and says "I'm outta here!!! I don't want anything more today, I just want to get done!" We make our appointment for Tuesday which will be his next chemo treatment (Vincristine) and are on the road again. On our way home we stop by to see my friend Sue, who is working with Nancy and Steve on the Fund Raiser. She hasn't seen Zack for many years and since he was feeling a little better we thought a quick visit would be nice. We then go by The Tractor Supply store in Brevard, where Chris works. Having never been in there before I sure go an education and found my next new project. Not really... but aren't they cute?
I tease Zack, showing him the pictures and tell him I'm going to start raising chickens. His exact words? "Good luck with that Mom."
We are back home by 7 pm and since I'm still not feeling that great, sit and relax for an hour or so and by 8 pm I crawl in bed to rest. Zack too has gone to bed early, playing his games and talking to his friends. Poor Frank, just doesn't seem to get the best of us lately. If rest is what can heal us, then we are doing exactly what needs to be done.
Zack plans on working on his truck this weekend. He has been having brake problems and there are a couple of other parts he needs to replace before he can drive it again. The weather is supposed to turn cold again, so my plans are to rest and heal (again!!!) As always, one day at a time, with no expectations. Life has a way of surprising us (mostly with good!!!).
Zack and Frank wrapped up around 5 pm and grabbed dinner on the way home. Zack had slept most of the day during treatment so he was pretty well rested when they arrived home. He was very nauseous, but in a pretty good mood considering. On my way home I call Mom to see how her day went. She mentions about the post Zack put on FB about how many treatments are left. I am in shock, this is the first time I hear the numbers, not the time frame. ! I arrive home and ask Zack and Frank. They both stated that when Zack asked the nurse, she confirmed he has three more out patient and one more hospital treatments. Once those are completed he will have the full course of testing to ensure that everything is still gone. In a couple of months following they will remove the port access. So, we are looking at the beginning of May when he will be done with chemo. YAHOO!!
Zack is not in the best of moods when we leave the house, but by the time we arrive at the Center, we are joking and he is teasing me about everything. I love the way he can turn everything around. We arrive and with a single shot of Neulasta in the arm, he is done. Zack tells them he is not feeling well and the Doctor tells us we should have come in earlier so he could get IV fluids. I then look at the Doctor and tell him that we stopped and Zack ate Taco Bell on the way there, so he feels bad but not due to lack of hydration. The nurse and Doctor both laugh and say "that makes US nauseous, if you can eat like that you're feeling ok." Zack looks at him and says "I'm outta here!!! I don't want anything more today, I just want to get done!" We make our appointment for Tuesday which will be his next chemo treatment (Vincristine) and are on the road again. On our way home we stop by to see my friend Sue, who is working with Nancy and Steve on the Fund Raiser. She hasn't seen Zack for many years and since he was feeling a little better we thought a quick visit would be nice. We then go by The Tractor Supply store in Brevard, where Chris works. Having never been in there before I sure go an education and found my next new project. Not really... but aren't they cute?
I tease Zack, showing him the pictures and tell him I'm going to start raising chickens. His exact words? "Good luck with that Mom."We are back home by 7 pm and since I'm still not feeling that great, sit and relax for an hour or so and by 8 pm I crawl in bed to rest. Zack too has gone to bed early, playing his games and talking to his friends. Poor Frank, just doesn't seem to get the best of us lately. If rest is what can heal us, then we are doing exactly what needs to be done.
Zack plans on working on his truck this weekend. He has been having brake problems and there are a couple of other parts he needs to replace before he can drive it again. The weather is supposed to turn cold again, so my plans are to rest and heal (again!!!) As always, one day at a time, with no expectations. Life has a way of surprising us (mostly with good!!!).
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